I'm a microwave popcorn moron.

Today at work my boss made microwave popcorn. With my mouth drooling and a slight giggle, I opened my "food cabinet" at my desk to find 2 bags of popcorn left in my stash.

"Oh yes!" I thought.

I quickly made my way to the kitchen, put the bag in-correct side up-hit the Popcorn button and listened to it whir.

Knowing this particular microwave has some issues-I made sure to listen for the "2 second gap" between pops instead of relying on the actual timer.

When 34 seconds were left on the timer, I stopped the microwave and pulled my bag out, only to find it was BURNT!

Doh.

So, I tromp back to my desk, grab the second bag. Back to the kitchen where I wisely chose a different microwave. This one didn't have the evil Popcorn button, so I just put it on 3 minutes and listened for the "2 second gap" once again.

When about 45 seconds were left on the timer I retrieved the bag. It smelled good

for a millisecond.

This one burned too!!!!!!!!!

I tromped back to my desk and pulled out my orange.

Sigh.

Pop Secret 94% Fat Free Butter Snack Bag, you kicked my butt.